Vanity is Embarrassing...but it's still not picking your nose

So, after my rant about cubicle etiquette a few days ago, yours truly got busted in a compromising position this afternoon.

There I was, minding my business in my cube. I was wearing really cute shoes; every time I wear them, I marvel at their cuteness. I love these shoes with the bright pink flower print (so much so that I usually email OND just to tell her that I love my shoes, because she gets me like that). I love them so much, that I saw fit to hike up my pants leg and stretch my foot out in front of me. Pointing my toe, rotating my ankle to admire every angle, loving how thin my ankles looked...I glance up to see some techie standing in the entry to my cube, watching me. I quickly pretended to scratch an imaginary itch on my ankle and proceeded to be very busy and important.

I might be vain, but at least I wasn't doing something my mama would be ashamed of.

PMS is so unfair

My stream of thought on my drive home today:

I hate that we're having soup for dinner tonight. I would really like to have a burger. Yeah, a juicy burger all charred on the outside, on a buttered and toasted bun with a thick slice of red onion, tomato, lettuce, extra extra pickles, and all drippy with mustard and ketchup. Having a burger is a great excuse to have french fries, really really salty shoestring french fries. Because you can't have a burger without fries. Unless you're eating at a really good grille restaurant, and they have awesome onion rings. If I can convince The Husband to take me out to a burger place, I can get onion rings with my burger, and he never finishes his plate so I can eat the rest of his salty, greasy fries. Totally win-win for me. But first I'll want a side salad with ranch dressing and bacon and cheese. Then maybe we can go to Ben and Jerry's and I can get a chocolate shake. Or I can make brownies and make brownie sundaes. Or maybe we can just order pizza. Super greasy cheese pizza with a side of fried moz. 

But we had soup. And all I can think about is the burger of my dreams.

Worth a spanking

Do you remember Jello Pudding Pops and Jello Gelatin Pops? I loved those things when I was little. When I was seven, my mother and brother left me at home while they went to my grandmother's. No fear, Grandma lived next door so there was little child endangerment. I remember this evening so clearly. It was in the middle of one of those summery, evening thunderstorms, and I was sprawled out in front of the tv watching Scooby-Doo. Mom told me that I could have ONE Jello Gelatin Pop while she was gone. I mean it when I say I loved these things. I ended up eating the whole box. I knew with each bite that I should stop, I swore that each pop would be the last...but I couldn't stop. Once the last pop was eaten, cold fear set in...oh, no. I was going to be in BIG trouble. When Mom walked in the back door:

Me:  "Spank me. Please spank me right now."

Mom:  "Why?"  

Me:  "Don't look in the freezer or the trash can. Please just spank me."

Mom:  "What did you do?"

Me:  "I ate all of the Jello Pops. Spank me."

Mom:  Hysterical laughter 

I did not get spanked due to my authentic regret for my bad decision, but that incident proves my love for frozen Jello products. For years I've wondered why they were taken off the market. I bought Popsicle brand Fudgsicles in the Triple Chocolate variety last week. First, let me say they are absolutely crave-worthy. Second, they taste so much like the pudding pops! Especially the white chocolate flavor. It takes me right back to childhood, and I still stand the danger of eating the entire box (though I have a little more self-control now)!

I'd still take a spanking for them.